Side Items: You Want Fries with That?
by Light'by'day
Summary: A collection of hot, slightly greasy, salty, but mostly sweet and humorous drabbles and short stories featuring the antics and romantics of Sere/Dare & usual pairings of the Senshi/Shinttenou. Mostly AU, but may have some canon. Enjoy!
1. Bright Ideas From Asinine Boyfriends

Hi guys! I just wanted to drop a little fun on ya! I hope you enjoy the workings of my twisted mind. Please review to let me know how you like it, it would mean so much!^^

I'm still working on other stories, but I had to write this!

***********Rated M: Mostly for language and AU***********************

~~~~~~~~~`I DO NOT OWN SAILOR MOON OR ANY BRANDS THAT MAY BE FEATURED IN THESE SIDE ITEMS!~~~~~~~~~

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"Dude, this is wrong on so many levels."

"Shut up will you? Did you get what we need?"

With a slight nod and a guilty look, Jayden pulled a slightly crumpled pharmacy bag from his back pocket.

"You had no idea how embarrassing it was to get this. I swear I got the weirdest fucking stares from the cashier. You owe me man."

"I don't owe you shit. It was your idea in the first place. Now pass me the stuff."

Jayden sighed but passed his auburn haired comrade the "stuff," as he called it. "I was only _joking_. I didn't think you'd actually take me seriously!" he ground out.

Ignoring Jayden's outburst, Nick tore open the crumpled bag and the small package that housed the goods. Dumping a few on a small sheet of wax paper, he pressed and twisted the bottom of a heavy glass on top of the pharmaceuticals trying to crush them. "Okay…good…good." Nick fingered the substance, seemingly pleased with his grinding methods, effectively turning the "stuff" into a fine white powder.

Jayden gulped visibly and wiped his sweaty palms on the front of his jeans. "What happens if they taste it? Huh? What'll we do then?"

"Jay, stop being such a pussy! Here, you mix it." Nick said, sliding a mixing bowl filled nearly to the brim with fluffy, milk chocolate confectionary covering over to Jayden.

"I'm pretty sure this shit is illegal and I'm in no rush to become somebody's bitch. I'm too pretty for jail, if you hadn't noticed." Jay stated weakly, but still proceeded to pick up the small rubber spatula to stir the "stuff" into the bowl.

"Whatever man. Anyway, too late- you bought the shit so you're already an accomplice. Plus, you know I'll kick your ass if you snitch. So stop your whining and stir faster so this shit doesn't clump.

"I'm not worried about you kicking my ass, _Nick_. What I'm worried about, is your ass kicking girlfriend, who could probably snap my fucking neck like a twig! And not to mention what Rei would do-"

"Jay you're showing a lot of bitchass-ness right now, and I'm gonna need you to be a man about it! Or would you rather get bitched out by Rei _and_ Lita for something as simple as _breathing_?"

Blue eyes widening in fright at just the _thought_ of their girlfriends' p.m.s, Jay suddenly found the cahones to stir the substance vigorously into the icing, lest it clump and blow their plan to hell.

"Glad you see the point, my friend." And with a grim smile, Nick gave a brotherly pat to Jayden's back and offered to spread the enhanced icing onto a plate of double chocolate cupcakes.

"Okay, now put some of those rainbow sprinkles on that shit to make it look pretty. A little more…a little more….." he prodded Nick, now fully into the scheme of drugging their p.m.s.-riddled girlfriends with Midol laced cupcakes.

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_I swear to you all on a stack of freshly baked cookies- that my husband considered doing this to me!_

_Hell, I don't blame him....I can be pretty beastly......_

**_Please Review! _**

_Lots of love,_

_~~~*L.b.D*~~~_


	2. The Kingdom Cartel part I

**The Kingdom Cartel **

Part I

Warning: A tad bit angsty.

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"_In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women." _

_ - Tony Montana, Scarface_

The Argentinian boy gazed around his domicile; more of a prison of sorts, stagnant air and thick bars built to keep the dreams of a wonderful life away. As he lay on the single cot, his thoughts of sorrow etched and pooled in depths as blue as the Gulf he came across when he was a small boy. Loneliness was his being; all that he knew, all that he had, all that he remembered. Tragic times were behind him, but the road was bleak ahead. Living in a rundown orphanage for the past 11 years tended to make one pessimistic and uncaring. The meager scraps of food and hand me down clothes were provided because of the bear necessity; the only requirements by law. The notion of love and warmth only existed in the worn out bindings of the fairytales he'd read as a child, thereby staunching his beliefs of happy endings. Thoughts of belonging and acceptance were unexpected and unheard of in places such as these, where kids were cruel, and the adults even crueler. Innocence no longer lived behind those eyes; vanished in the void of forever. Though sad and desolate his life had been he vowed to rise above it, to soar above the austere surroundings as a phoenix rises from the deepest cinders. He wasn't stupid; he knew that to make it in this world you needed money, power, and respect. However, if he was going to make it on his own and stay out on his own (damned if he ever came back) he needed ready cash. His looks could get him there in a hurry-perhaps by prostitution. The money would be quick, easy even…

He grimaced at the thought of selling his body; fierce pride and intelligence would not give another moment to entertain the possibility. Although he was only 17 years of age, his physique was of a man, tall and lean. His shaggy hair was the tone of black velvet, smooth and thick to the touch. Spanish genes painted his smooth skin an even tone of smooth, sweet caramel. His face still seemed a bit young, denoting his age only if one looked hard enough. Despite his blessed looks, he knew that he would need more. Book smarts was not enough, as the world had clearly shown him. Strangers on the street ignored him and more than once his fellow orphans had taken him for a fool. It had been when he first arrived, but he never forgot the way they set him up to take the fall for their indiscretions. They labeled him a defiant liar for defending his truth, and as punishment, the headmaster issued him a beating that had lasted well into the night. Scars still lingered, though more apparent on his persona than physical appearance. His heart hardened throughout the years, serving as a protective barrier against those around him and the outside world, never to experience the light of love. Being the keeper of a cold heart didn't bother him much, for the only thing that mattered to him was living a new life; wishing to become his own man. Nevertheless, wishing would never get one anywhere; it was a fact that he had come to know as well as the night knew the stars. And so, with shallow breaths and steady feet, he escaped the only place he had known, vowing to the God above, that he would not spend another day locked within a nightmare of reality.

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_I had to write this... lingering ideas and such. Although I *do* feel like I'm missing some elements, I think this is the closest visual I can give you from my imagination. Did you see it well? _

_This was originally supposed to be a part of a stand alone mini-series...I'm sure it'll be compiled in the future. I'm a bit rusty with my writing, since it's been sooooo long since I've updated anything..( uninspired, increased class load,busy life in general). But hopefully I can get some of these short stories to kick start my muse. Someone KICK it PLEASE! ^_^_

_Anyway, Thanks for reading!_

_Please review ^_^_

_Hugs, kisses, and cookies!_

_~*~*~*~L.b.D.~*~*~*~_


	3. Indulgence

**INDULGENCE**

Rating: M-ish

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"Beautiful…" I whispered, placing ethereal kisses along the contours of his sculptured face. On their own accord, my elegant fingertips graced his lips, trailing an invisible line down to his beating heart. His shallow breathing colored the night air faintly with whispers of life, but he had yet to rouse. It was moments like this- in the afterglow of lovemaking- that I allowed myself to appreciate the quiet beauty of my part time lover. Sighing in serenity as I lay against his body, the tips of my bare breasts stroked against his side teasing him awake. Dark feathered lashes parted to reveal the Terran's smoky grey eyes and I saw that his stare mirrored my own. Strong hands skimmed along the dip and curve of my waist, gripping and arousing, tantalizing and enthralling. Our breaths skipped in rhythm with the beat of twin hearts as his lips found solace on my heated skin. His tongue was silken and warm as it enveloped me in a dizzying, passionate kiss from swollen lips to my very core. Sparks ignited into flames of want and desire, emblazoning the silent feelings into words of pleasure. Although deeper emotions of worship and devotion swirled beneath unbridled lust, the sacred words would remain unsaid in this forbidden tryst… for I am promised to his liege.

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_Hmmm...Serenity and Kunzite...I've got a thing for these two. _

_Am I wrong for that? _

_Please review! _

_Hugs, kisses, and *secrets*,_

_~*~*~*~*L.b.D.*~*~*~*~_


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